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The great Stop Fucking Him post

This post won't be for everyone. If you're uncomfortable with hearty leftist political opinions, you might want to skip it. I've gone ahead and lj-cut it out of consideration for (a). people who'd rather pass on it and (b). people who are at work, and might prefer to skip repeated derivations of the word "fuck" in bold face type. That having been said, feel free to keep reading or move right along. I promise not to take it personally.

Edit: Yes, yes yes -- feel free to link
this wherever you like. I don't mind.


This is not about abortion.

If you read the article in its entirety, I think that much is obvious -- this is not about abortion. If this were about abortion -- specifically, about fewer abortions being performed -- then those interested in reducing that number would hop all over this bill. So I'll say it again, this is not about abortion.

This is about women having sex, and who gets to be in charge of that sex.


Well, really -- that's what it all comes down to, isn't it? At present, there is a movement in place to make sure that (to lift a phrase from Dan Savage) men have orgasms, and women have babies.

There are people in this world who very firmly believe that this is the natural order of things: men have orgasms, and women have babies. This is a sacred balance, whereby a man is made happy for two minutes and a woman spends the next nine months serving as host to a life-threatening parasite, then the next eighteen years held legally, morally, and fiscally responsible for the health and well-being of that parasite ... while the man is free to wander off or stick around at his leisure.

This is a balance that many, many people -- many of them in positions of power -- are willing to go to great lengths to enforce. Never mind that many (but not all) of these people are men, and are therefore unlikely to be held accountable for any parasite more complex than a tapeworm ... for some strange reason or reasons, these people want to make sure that it is very, very difficult for your average American woman to manage her reproductive system.

Most of the people who object to the wide, easy availability of birth control are men. These men have the luxury of assuming this position because they have no reason to believe that they, personally, have anything at stake. I find this baffling.

The solution is so obvious that it can be boiled down to three words: stop fucking them.
That's right. Stop fucking them.

If your man doesn't understand that if he's entitled to an orgasm, you're entitled to an unoccupied uterus -- stop fucking him. If he can't get it through his thick skull that his fleeting pleasure poses a mortal threat to you -- stop fucking him. No handjobs, no blowjobs, no orgasms for him whatsoever except by his own hand, until you can be completely assured of a baby-free future, at your discretion.

These men do not deserve access to your pants. Stop fucking them.

I don't know what you think you owe them, and I don't care how badly they whine or beg. I don't care if they're wonderful boyfriends otherwise. I don't care if you're married to them. Stop fucking them. It is still your body. It is still your call. Clearly, they do not understand this. So stop fucking them.

They will not die if you do not fuck them. Stop fucking them.

Remember: You can hold out longer than they can. I promise. Your sex toys are better,* your self-control is superior, and your stakes are higher. Stop fucking them. You deserve better. You deserve someone who is aware that your body is your domain, and who respects that. If he doesn't respect that, stop fucking him.

Just stop. Stop it. You deserve better, and he deserves a cold shower if he thinks he is entitled to control over your vagina and how you manage its daily operation. Stop fucking him if he thinks that someone other than you should determine what hangs around inside you. Stop fucking him, because he would sooner masturbate with a corkscrew than let you dictate how he receives his prostate exams.

Stop fucking him if he refers to birth control as your problem, then helps vote in legislation that makes it your really big fucking problem. Stop fucking him if he thinks that your inability to prevent conception should in no way prevent him from having sex with you.

It's not that complicated.
Stop fucking him.
Stop it. Seriously.
Christ.




* And illegal in some states. Coincidence? I think not.



Comments

( 1385 comments — Leave a comment )
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ms_violet
Mar. 4th, 2005 02:43 pm (UTC)
(thunderous applause)
bookstar
Mar. 4th, 2005 04:28 pm (UTC)
(even more thunderous applause)
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I like this. - tamarion - Mar. 5th, 2005 06:25 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - pyro09 - Mar. 6th, 2005 02:43 am (UTC) - Expand
Ummm.... YEAH! *raises fist tentatively* - (Anonymous) - Dec. 23rd, 2006 04:07 pm (UTC) - Expand
martinhesselius
Mar. 4th, 2005 02:43 pm (UTC)
::Nods::
My state outlaws vibrators.
jasmine_koran
Mar. 4th, 2005 02:45 pm (UTC)
Good lord. Move.
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the eye o fhe beholder... and all that - nicoteena - Mar. 9th, 2005 04:23 am (UTC) - Expand
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That is absolutely sickening.... - tamarion - Mar. 5th, 2005 06:22 pm (UTC) - Expand
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kylakae
Mar. 4th, 2005 02:44 pm (UTC)
Amen!
scarfish
Mar. 4th, 2005 02:44 pm (UTC)
THANK YOU!!!
I'm going to link this high and low, with your permission. Maybe this will start a movement...if even half of America's women took up this stance, legislation would change in a heartbeat.
cmpriest
Mar. 4th, 2005 02:51 pm (UTC)
Re: THANK YOU!!!
have at, baby.
viva la resistance!
Re: THANK YOU!!! - rintheamazing - Mar. 4th, 2005 02:54 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: THANK YOU!!! - arndis - Mar. 4th, 2005 05:50 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: THANK YOU!!! - nora_knickers - Mar. 8th, 2005 02:08 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: if only half the women........... - (Anonymous) - Jul. 23rd, 2006 07:31 pm (UTC) - Expand
jasmine_koran
Mar. 4th, 2005 02:45 pm (UTC)
Bravo.
ms_violet
Mar. 4th, 2005 02:45 pm (UTC)
quoting the article
Referring to Reid and Clinton, Tony Perkins of the conservative Family Research Council said, "Their idea of reducing unintended pregnancies is more sex education and distribution of contraceptives. ... That's not the solution, that's part of the problem."

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
mecampbellesq
Mar. 4th, 2005 03:59 pm (UTC)
Re: quoting the article
It makes you wonder sometimes if these people even THINK about what they're saying!
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missysedai
Mar. 4th, 2005 02:46 pm (UTC)
Here via [Bad username: the ferrett]...

I think I love you.
missysedai
Mar. 4th, 2005 02:47 pm (UTC)
The would be theferrett. <*sigh*>
(no subject) - cmpriest - Mar. 4th, 2005 02:50 pm (UTC) - Expand
thornsilver
Mar. 4th, 2005 02:46 pm (UTC)
Oh, yes! (It worked in Lysistrata, right?) :)
lakos
Mar. 4th, 2005 03:04 pm (UTC)
Well, it worked to stop a war in Lysistrata, iirc. I don't know if it will work to stamp out misogynism (sp?). Would be nice if it did.
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penmage
Mar. 4th, 2005 02:53 pm (UTC)
Amen. Excellent post - now lets put it on billboards and get the message across to everyone.
bantiarna
Mar. 4th, 2005 02:54 pm (UTC)
Hear Hear!

Robert D Rakeford on the John Boy and Billy show took this a step further the other day talking about how women complain about the cost of raising children and how it inconviences their lives. Professional working women who felt entitled to federally funded daycare so that they could continue to work full time and not have to pay for daycare and they wanted better federally sponsored paid maternity leave. Its expensive and time consuming to have a baby, I know, I have 2.

And as you so eloquently put it (paraphrasing ofcourse) if you dont want kids, dont want to spend the time, effort and money it takes to raise them into mature intellegent adults Stop Fucking

As the parent of two small children who I believe are worth every dime, tear and drop of sweat, I just couldnt agree with your post more.
drooling_ferret
Mar. 4th, 2005 03:31 pm (UTC)
Robert D Rakeford on the John Boy and Billy show took this a step further the other day talking about how women complain about the cost of raising children and how it inconviences their lives.

Because that's not right out of Oz...
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cissa
Mar. 4th, 2005 03:00 pm (UTC)
YES. And thank you for this.
lakos
Mar. 4th, 2005 03:02 pm (UTC)
*claps*
the_wanlorn
Mar. 4th, 2005 03:04 pm (UTC)
::cheers::

Is it okay if I link to this in my LJ?
cmpriest
Mar. 4th, 2005 03:10 pm (UTC)
help yourself.
anyone who wants to can link this, and link freely.
great LJ handle, by the way.

;-)
kicktothehead
Mar. 4th, 2005 03:05 pm (UTC)
Brava :)

I'm also here via Ferrett, and I was wondering if I could repost this (with credit) or link it to childfree.
cmpriest
Mar. 4th, 2005 03:10 pm (UTC)
have at.
also, you've got a most exceptional icon.

v. cute.
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kibbles
Mar. 4th, 2005 03:05 pm (UTC)
I find it hard to believe that there are women doing that, at least pro-choice women fucking anti-choice men.

I mean I know you aren't lying, I just find it hard to believe that people do that.

And it should go both ways -- I remember one guy wanting to have sex with me at a party, and I flung out at him, curiously, "And what if I got pregnant, even with birth control" he said to me that he expected me to have an abortion. While this may be true, to me, this was anti-choice as well, and he was denied access.

Something so fundamental to the actual sex act should be clear before sperm is in any way present outside the body at any point during the relationship. If you are both not on the same wavelength for this, I can't see how it can continue. It's not like someone who likes cats hooking up with a dog lover. This is serious.
cmpriest
Mar. 4th, 2005 03:09 pm (UTC)
preach on, sistah.
but in my experience, the world's greatest anti-feminists are always women. precious few intelligent pro-choice women fuck anti-choice men. that's not the problem.
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True... - scarfish - Mar. 4th, 2005 06:32 pm (UTC) - Expand
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dslartoo
Mar. 4th, 2005 03:06 pm (UTC)
Not that I don't agree with your "stop fucking him if he refers to birth control as your problem"...but, um, why is this bill a bad thing? It seems to me as if it's designed to make it easier to find information about, obtain, and pay for contraceptives, and isn't that a good thing? Yes, those contraceptives are aimed at women, but men already have it as easy as can be as far as quick contraception goes -- walk into a store, pay a couple bucks, walk out with your package of condoms. I don't understand why this bill has you upset -- enlighten me?

cheers,
Phil
cmpriest
Mar. 4th, 2005 03:08 pm (UTC)
it IS a good thing.

where did i imply that it was a bad thing? i said that if people were serious about reducing abortions and promoting birth control, they'd be all about this bill.
(no subject) - dslartoo - Mar. 4th, 2005 03:09 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - hakainokami - Mar. 4th, 2005 08:20 pm (UTC) - Expand
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Meh - (Anonymous) - Jun. 3rd, 2005 09:36 am (UTC) - Expand
hmmm, not sure that's the point... - cortneytree - Mar. 4th, 2005 03:15 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: hmmm, not sure that's the point... - cmpriest - Mar. 4th, 2005 03:16 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: hmmm, not sure that's the point... - cortneytree - Mar. 4th, 2005 03:19 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: hmmm, not sure that's the point... - dslartoo - Mar. 4th, 2005 03:17 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: hmmm, not sure that's the point... - cortneytree - Mar. 4th, 2005 03:20 pm (UTC) - Expand
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pather
Mar. 4th, 2005 03:07 pm (UTC)
beautifully simplistic.
ashley_y
Mar. 7th, 2005 08:59 am (UTC)
Yes.
rhapsody_98
Mar. 4th, 2005 03:08 pm (UTC)
Lemme hear an AMEN!!

*AMEN!*

Preach it sista! Preach it from the mountaintops, and lo, I will follow you all the days of my life!
mamoulian
Mar. 4th, 2005 03:09 pm (UTC)
Referring to Reid and Clinton, Tony Perkins of the conservative Family Research Council said, "Their idea of reducing unintended pregnancies is more sex education and distribution of contraceptives. ... That's not the solution, that's part of the problem.

"If they want to start promoting abstinence, fine — but they won't."


I would suggest that perhaps a "Stop fucking the guy that wants to remove your rights and start fucking the guys that don't" agenda.

"then the next eighteen years held legally, morally, and fiscally responsible for the health and well-being of that parasite "


So wait you want equal responsibilty for that 2 minutes of fun now? That's just crazy talk. Next you'll want equal pay for the same job. I think you should step away from the keyboard and start planning tonights dinner... Kidding of course. My friend actually gave up trying to get child support because the guy was such a asshat. Sad but true stories.

genderfur
Mar. 4th, 2005 05:32 pm (UTC)
ahahaha! And I know of someone who received years'n'years of back child support because the ex's new sweetie found out the problem, and she stopped fucking him until he made right.

Years ahead of her time, she was.
(no subject) - wiliqueen - Mar. 4th, 2005 06:20 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - malkaia101 - Mar. 5th, 2005 08:56 pm (UTC) - Expand
twfarlan
Mar. 4th, 2005 03:10 pm (UTC)
Gods bless you, Cherie Priest. (wild applause)
wolfsilveroak
Mar. 4th, 2005 03:11 pm (UTC)
I loved that. Thank you}:)
unrepentant
Mar. 4th, 2005 03:12 pm (UTC)
OK, I am completely against no more fucking. 100%. Mark that down, if need be.
cmpriest
Mar. 4th, 2005 03:15 pm (UTC)
are you in the pool of men who want to restrict birth control and sex ed? i know you, and i bet you're not.

therefore, you should get fucked!
(no subject) - unrepentant - Mar. 4th, 2005 03:43 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - mostlie_sunnie - Mar. 4th, 2005 07:32 pm (UTC) - Expand
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(Deleted comment)
pope_guilty
Mar. 4th, 2005 03:41 pm (UTC)
I hear ya!
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Golly. - auroramama - Mar. 4th, 2005 09:47 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - chime - Mar. 4th, 2005 09:58 pm (UTC) - Expand
corwinok
Mar. 4th, 2005 03:13 pm (UTC)
Amen
Let's hear it for the Gospel of cmpriest. I was sufficiently moved to link to it from my own pulpit.
gatcat
Mar. 5th, 2005 03:25 pm (UTC)
I thought Christ wrote it. Says so at the bottom.
(no subject) - corwinok - Mar. 5th, 2005 04:51 pm (UTC) - Expand
pope_guilty
Mar. 4th, 2005 03:15 pm (UTC)
I just woke up and came almost directly to this. Right the fuck on, and thanks for a great article.
cmpriest
Mar. 4th, 2005 03:16 pm (UTC)
thanks -- and thanks for the LOL over your lj handle.
hee hee.
;-)
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